Intro to You: an online course by Rev Krystal Jakosky is available NOW! Click here to start your journey today.


Getting Clearer


So we’ve talked about how we mirror each other. Those amazing traits I love in you also exist in me. And the reverse is true too, the things I find frustrating in you are also things I possess and have an opportunity to look at and embrace or change.


We’ve also talked about how our actions are a mirror telling people how we want to be treated. If we choose to love and take care of ourselves people see this and assist in our mission. On the flip side, if we push hard and crash, they will likely see this as how we want to be treated and encourage us to continue in our efforts.


When our mirror hasn’t been cleaned in a while and the reflection needs some attention, what we see reflected back doesn’t support where we truly want to be. We say one thing and our actions supporting a different point of view leave us internally struggling and disappointed. 


While we need to get right with ourselves first, we then need to get right with those around us. How much of our own stuff is contributing to the challenging relationships?



In looking at a mirror we need to clean there are still two sides to the reflection. There’s the true inner you wishing and hoping to get out. And the views attempting to come in through the haze. 


Getting clear is an action within yourself as well as with those around you.


When we’re unclear about our own wants and needs it’s sincerely difficult for those around you to help meet them. Even if we had mastered telepathy, no one knows what you want or need if you yourself aren’t clear. Gaining clarity for yourself means you are then able to be clearer in your communication and relationships.


So, once you have acknowledged the dirt and grime, and know what kind of life you want to live, how do you bring that out?


Baby steps and self-introspection.


One of humanity’s biggest issues is being unable to express our thoughts, emotions, and feelings. In our society, it’s easy to feel stunted and shut down. The idea that someone may want to express any kind of emotion can leave them branded as weak and incapable of doing specific jobs. 


Yet, at our cores, emotions are an entire world of being. They ebb and flow and dictate so many of our actions. Tuning in at any given time we may find a tsunami, earthquake, gentle breeze, or lazy ocean waves. You may find fairy bells ringing or bursting rainbows of beautiful color. 


All of these emotions reflect out of us. Others feel them and react, pulled towards you or pushed away. Drawing in compassion, reflecting and expanding joy, repelling anger, united in fear. Taking a moment to connect with these and then checking the mirror you see a new view.




In normal, everyday life, people don’t generally set out to cause pain and hardship yet let’s say you’ve been hurt in some way.


Holding onto the upset makes you more angry and hurt each time you revisit the issue. And this is the reflection you are sending out towards the other individual or group. The bottled-up emotion begins obstructing the view of the glass. Think 


of a teapot with the lid on and as the water boils, a high-pitched squeal blasts through the peaceful facade and steam impedes your vision.


Would you want to approach someone who had this attitude and energy towards you? Or would you be repelled and walk away from the situation?


Would you like to release it? 


Here are a few questions to ask yourself. 


Is the other person aware of the pain inflicted? 


Was the hurt intentional? Meaning, do you think they thought about it and asked themselves, “How can I hurt this specific person?” 


Is there any benefit in holding on to this upset? If so, what is the benefit and what can you do about it to remove the pain? 


If there is no benefit, can you let the infraction go? Are you able to release the upset and move on with your amazing life? Drop it like a super stinky diaper or that wildly smelly cheese only unique people love. 


Can you find forgiveness for someone else in order to give your own soul more peace?


Only by seeking true and honest answers are you able to clear your mirror and remove the pain. 


When it comes to family friends and acquaintances, it’s a little harder to let go and yet the questions are even more valid.


Relationships are an ever-changing connection. They live and breathe with the people involved. As each person changes, the interaction does too, and the communication between people becomes even more important. Your reflection can become deeper and more connected or fuzzier as time goes on.

You choose what relationships you put the efforts into keeping clear and direct and you choose which ones can be left in the attic.


Doing the personal work to know and understand yourself will shine into others. A clear reflection from personal understanding makes it easier for people to understand you and encourages them to be clear as well.


“Holding onto a grudge is like drinking poison hoping the other person dies”. This poison muddies the mirror and makes it more challenging to find clarity and peace. And truthfully you have to clean your own mirror. No one can clean it for you and, likewise, you can’t make someone else see any clearer.


Help your mirror shine bright and joyful. 


Stop carrying around all of those things which drag you down and poison your soul. 


Clean out your pond and make it a place where people want to come to play and enjoy moments of respite and realness.


                                         with love,


Every week we deliver hard truths, actionable tips, and personal stories from Krystal to your inbox. Subscribe and get to know yourself better.

Suggested Posts