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Thank You and No Thank You

There are times we struggle. We may skin our knee, trip and fall, or feel like we’ve been pushed out of a speeding car. Maybe it has felt like you were tied to a railroad track with the train barrelling towards you at warp speed. We’ve all had those moments. Big and small.

And then there are the people who love us and want to help who tell us how to fix it. How to improve our situation. “You need to…” or “You should…” Sometimes this is really helpful. It can absolutely be easier to see solutions from outside of the brouhaha we’re living through.

In the same aspect, they aren’t living our experience and don’t fully know what balm can soothe and heal our souls.

There are times we ask for help, advice, input. We seek the perspective of another trusted being. And we then have the opportunity to listen and apply or disregard based on what our personal internal heart says will help. When I was struggling last year, people were blessing me with their opinions. Their intentions were kind and true. They meant well and it came from their heart and hope for seeing me regain my stamina and joy.

The thing was, the advice was given through their personal lens of what would help them. Applying it to my situation could be like building IKEA furniture solo. Or using super glue to close a wound that needs stitches. It’s possible and yet not always the best course of action.I needed to go inside. I needed to check in with my mental self, my physical self, my emotional self and see what I was experiencing so I could know how to help me. They couldn’t do that – only I could.

I found I needed quiet. I needed blissful time without expectations and responsibilities. Time where I got to ask, “What do I want to do today?” instead of the litany of required reading and productivity. I seriously needed time to stop. The world is loud. Tune it out so you can tune in to you. Into that inner voice that never steers you wrong and wants only the best for you and the adventure you are living. And then, be your own advocate:

“Thanks for your suggestion. I’ll put it in my bucket and see if it can apply.” 

“I appreciate your concern and I promise to check in to see if there’s anything you can do to help.” 

“I hear your love and am grateful to have you in my corner.”

So, what do you need in this moment? Or in the moments to come? Is there something you can do now to prepare for something you face in the future?


                                         with love,


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